I am an idiot.
I am writing this as penance for crimes against a committed relationship and for breaking an implied vow of silence. I told Lilly about an idea presented by my friend Sean for taking tests by trusting your gut. Sean put this thought forward in a thread on a discussion list that we both belong to. I was thinking that Lilly might consider this idea and be grateful for a new approach. And she was. At first. Then her curiosity kicked in.
L: "How did Sean know that I had trouble taking tests?" Hmm, I hadn't thought about this part of my presentation.
H: "Oh, the subject of test taking came up in a thread on our mailing list." Oops, I shouldn't have mentioned the source. I plunged on. "I said that while you understood the material you sometimes over-thought the questions and ended up giving wrong answers" I shouldn't have said 'wrong', but she she only pursed her lips a little and nodded, acknowledging the truth of my assessment and the wisdom of passing on such valuable advice.
So, having dodged a bullet, I got a little cocky and, chuckling, said, "Of course I also said that this might be because you are a Pisces". The pursed lips flattened. Shit.
L: "I'm not a Pisces, I am a Virgo." Deep shit. This conversation sounded familiar. Her brows dropped. "Virgos are thoughtful and consider possibilities, Pisces are *wishy* *washy*." Fuuuuck, I remember now. Her body tensed and her gaze bored into me. "Your ex *wife* is a Pisces." Fuckityshitfuckyshittyfuckfuck. "I want a correction posted on That List. Right. NOW."
So here it is: Lilly is a Virgo, a thoughtful being who is thorough in her analysis and generous in her tolerance of other's failings. Especially *my* failings as a forgetful and presumptuous boyfriend with leanings toward arrogance. I vow to always remember her birthday, her shoe size, and her temperature preferences for all things edible and wearable. I also vow to nevernevernever confuse her with my ex-wife.
Update: I read this to Lilly and she laughed, then said, "You know what would have been better? *Remembering* that I am a Virgo in the *first* place."