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H: Heh.

L: What’s funny?

H: So there’s this article on how staring at women’s breasts for 10 minutes a day helps to lower the blood pressure of men over 40.

L: (pause) OK, I am not even going to ask the usual battery of questions, “Who conducted this study?”, “In which peer-reviewed medical publication did this appear?”, “What was the sample size?” (sudden glare and pointing of finger) Shut-your-mouth-I-can-hear-that-one-coming. Instead, I will jump to the chase. (suspicious stare, dramatic pause) Did *Eric* send you this link?

H: (slightly offended) Some Germans did the study and published it in the New England Journal of Medi-

L: Na-NAH! (eyes wide, finger in stern warning position)

H: (collapsing and sheepish, small voice) Yes. It was Eric.

L: The same guy that told you about the study where periodic breast massage breaks down breast-cancer cells?

H: Um, well, I thought you liked-

L: Listen. I only have so much time in the day for boob related activities.

H: But this is for *my* health. We can combine the two. (pleading slightly) I can multi-task.

L: By ‘boob’, I meant you.

H: Oh.