L: So, today I went shopping. And I know that there are those who say “What are you doing shopping when you already have too much shit in your house as it is?”, but those people weren’t with me this afternoon and besides I needed to do something after not handing out food to homeless people who were harassing me for the fifth day in a row.
H: This is the program where you hand out food to kids in need at the park?
L: Yes, and although the kids are great, all of the homeless people in the park keep getting upset when I tell then that it is just for kids. So I needed some cheering and decided to go find a good deal. So I went to St. Vinnes and I got this, the best, the BEST, bowl in the whole world. It has running bunnies on it! And I knew that buying this bowl had completed my day and just when I thought it could not possibly go any better I found a matching mug! And then, when I was checking out I asked the lady for a very large bag to put them in and she asked why and I told here that I have a lot of garbage to throw away at home and she UNDERSTOOD! And I got everything half off the marked price! And the price was… $1.99!
Then, THEN, I went next door to Goodwill and you know that mauve shirt that I have that I really like for sleeping in and has what used to be lace across the bottom of the neck line but I love it because it feels so comfortable, and then I found another one just like it in purple and I was SO happy? Well, today I found another one, BRAND NEW, in pink. Still had the tag on it. My plan is to find one for every night of the week. And then I just had to buy this polkadot shirt because it just says “Hello, it’s Summer!” Doesn’t it?
H: Yes, it looks very Daisy Duke.
L: I know, right? And then I got another package of 4×6 notecards for just 25 cents, because I opened one of my packages last week and used a card.
H: So the rule is, use a card, buy a pack?
L: Yes! You see I am preparing for my Master’s Degree and I know that I am going to need a lot of notecards. Others prepare for their degree by studying but *I* prepare my own way.
H: By Shopping?
L: Yes! Yes, You understand!
H: No. No, not really. That was just a guess.